Saturday, July 14, 2012

Snot Cricket


Dictionary—

cricket 1 |ˈkrikit|nounan insect related to the grasshoppers. The male produces a characteristic rhythmical chirping sound. • Family Gryllidae: many genera and species, including the field cricket and the house cricket.ORIGIN Middle English : from Old French criquet, from criquer ‘to crackle,’ of imitative origin.cricket 2nounan open-air game played on a large grass field with ball, bats, and two wickets, between teams of eleven players, the object of the game being to score more runs than the opposition.Cricket is played mainly in Britain and in territories formerly under British rule, including Australia, South Africa, the West Indies, New Zealand, and the Indian subcontinent. The full game with two innings per side can last several days; shorter matches are usual at the amateur level and have become popular at professional level since the 1960s.PHRASESnot cricket Brit., informal a thing contrary to traditional standards of fairness or rectitude.DERIVATIVEScricketer nouncricketing adjectiveORIGIN late 16th cent.: of unknown origin.cricket 3nouna low stool, typically with a rectangular or oval seat and four legs splayed out.


I'm guessing Snot Cricket is that kind of cricket played on a slippery field. Pitch. Bowl. Whatever.


I have learned cricket from elsewhere on this blog in posts written by experts, so I will regale a bit.


"The male produces a characteristic rhythmic chirping sound." (In Georgia: Chirpin' sound.)


I can't relate that to wickets in the least. You'll just have to hold that thought about the male cricket players rubbing their legs together. Actually I didn't know females didn't make that noise too. Chirpin' I mean.


From criquer: 'to crackle.' Lordy don't THAT lose something in the translation? Stick to chirpin' and forget the French. Please.


"An open-air game played on a large grass field with ball, bats, and two wickets, between teams of eleven players, the object of the game being to score more runs than the opposition." Man, if THAT doesn't clear up the rules, you are pretty hopeless. What more could you want in the way of an explanation of the game of cricket? Nada. Zilch. What the hell about innings? He asks.


"Cricket is played mainly in Britain and in territories formerly under British rule...." Fair enough, but then they start listing all the countries formerly under British rule. What is the point of that? Some dictionary. An American dictionary, of course. It's like when I get those checks from my credit card companies every Thursday "to use for anything I want to buy" and then they make a list of all the things they can think of that money is good for. You know? RBS is the worst.


Well.


"The full game can last several days..." Bet it seems like YEARS, eh? Not to the English. Sorry. Btw, if you DO go back searching this blog for the REAL cricket posts, be sure not to miss the photo of the elderly English gent with all the hair on his back. Now, I am not trying to denigrate elderly British cricket fans who take off their shirt when they are sitting right in front of you - plenty of American men have too much hair on their backs too - I only mention it in passing so you will know there is something to look at during the match, besides the game, as the weeks between innings drag by.


Now, then, "Phrase Snot cricket": a thing contrary to traditional standards of fairness or rectitude.


So, if someone tries to break the rules, or bend the rules, and you catch them, you just yell out "That Snot Cricket!!" Or, if Jewish, "That Snot Kosher!"


I really AM learning this BritishSpeak stuff, but, God, sometimes it is like pulling teeth, you know?


Feeling extra old today. "Memory almost full" it says. And it's not talking about my computer.


Holy mackerel.



26 comments:

  1. Cricket? Rounders with two bats.
    At least the players can speak English properly (Not the Aussies obviously).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmmmm. Truer words were often spoken.

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  2. Georgia is not the only state where the "g" is dropped!
    Okay, okay...I admit I speak that way but not around my English husband, I sound like Dick VAn Dyke from Mary Poppins around him!

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    Replies
    1. I really think Dick Van Dyke did such a fine Cockney accent. Some readers of this blog, those of the mud-slinging sneering types of York environs, have expressed extreme jealousy that an American actor could do so well, but you and I can appreciate real art when we see it. Yall are very astute.

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    2. PS-If your English husband is of the Yorkshire persuasion, I retract the middle part of the above comment. Hope not, though.

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  3. Yorkie was right, although I did not see the film.

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    Replies
    1. How can you condemn a book when you've never read it? How can you say a movie is bad if you've never seen it? How can you say and accent is bad if you've never heard it?

      Typical Scots reasoning and sucking up to a Yorkshireman. Do you think you will get any credit from him for that?

      Just as Tony Blair and the Iron Lady should be looked up to for their successes and wealth-earning capabilities, so too should you not demean a Hollywood saint whom you have never even seen perform in Mary Poppins. I mean, he touched Mary Tyler Moore in her prime for goodness sakes!

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    2. Sadly the song has been played a billion times. The soundtrack and clips offered millions of times and THAT is why I have never seen the film.
      I suspect you have the DVD however......

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    3. Suck up to a Yorkie?
      Credit from a Yorkie?
      Pah!

      I enclose a wall.
      Please place Thatcher & Blair against it and line up the firing party.

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    4. Touched Mary Tyler Moore?
      that explains why we don't see him anymore.

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    5. Blast!
      Now I've picked up your many posts habit!

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    6. DVD? Of Mary Poppins? Erm... no.

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    7. Anyway, we weren't talking about a song. We were talking about Dick Van Dyke's wonderfully correct cockney accent.

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  4. Phew - My mind was positively boggling when I first saw the title. Snot Cricket? Dear Lord.

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    Replies
    1. I'm sure you didn't take the time (couldn't be arsed as we say here) and I can't say as I blame you, but if you had you would have seen that the dictionary used the term Snot cricket. I think. Did I read it wrong?

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    2. Haven't heard of it before, and you're right, I didn't look it up. Will do so now.

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    3. No - the only thing that's coming up for Snot Cricket is this blog.

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    4. Geez Toni, it's only a run-on word from the dictionary paste. No space between the S and the n. Look:

      ... have become popular at professional level since the 1960s.PHRASESnot cricket Brit., informal a thing contrary to traditional standards of fairness or ...

      It's supposed to be PHRASES "not cricket..."

      I didn't mean any harm. It seemed funny when I saw it. I will do better next time. :)

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  5. Replies
    1. What's a silly point? Why are you being so veiled?

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    2. I'm not veiled. I don't even wear a hat.

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  6. "a sport that is enjoyed by millions, some of them awake and facing the right way"

    Bill Bryson.

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    Replies
    1. Ah. Bill Bryson. Well, I think you would agree that "enjoyed" was a poor choice of word.

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