Prince Harry accidentally reveals royal baby gender!

Such was the headline of a stupid celebrity gossip site that Google stuck in front of my face when I searched to see if anything royal had been born yet.

Give me a break! Even Adullamite wouldn't believe the crap that site cranks out. I wouldn't even read it if I didn't have to do some serious research for my own blog.

According to "reports", the site gushes, "Harry has been telling everyone Wills and Kate are having a boy and how THRILLED he is at the prospect of having a little nephew.

And thus dropping His Harryness down to about 117th in line to the throne. Thrilled. I'm sure.

Ok, 4th.

I think.

And if he lives to be 400, Harry might become king. Of something.

"I'm 'enery the ninth I am, 'enery the ninth I am I am
I got married to the widder next door
She's been married eight times before
And every one was an 'enery
She wouldn't have a willy (Ha!) or a Sam
(No Sam)
I'm her ninth old man named 'enery

'Enery the ninth I am.
Holy crap!"

Contraction Watch

Any time now. Maybe as I am writing this. Maybe before you read this. All the U.K. (or at least England) is betting on just about everything baby right now. Boy? Girl? (Girl) Color hair? (Ginger of course.) Rich? You bet.

I'm so excited.

If it's a girl, name her Diana.

If it's a boy? Well, perhaps he'll be king at the turn of the next century. Make one of his names Arthur. And one Albert. And one George. If you have room for one more, I vote for "Mick."

Have there ever been three future kings alive at the same time before?

Probably.

62 gun salute from the tower. (or is it to be 65?)

What a time to be alive, hey?

Getting girls and such

The primary question on the mind of a teenaged boy of hormonal overload age has always been the same throughout history: "How do I get girls?"

For quite some time now, the main answers to that - and both seem perfectly logical to said boys - are: "I'll go out for sports and be a football star" and "I'll start a rock and roll band."

Both work.

What if you are a skinny kid with an unfortunate nose whose eyesight is so weak you have to wear thick glasses all the time, just to keep from running into trees? Probably the football idea would give way to learning how to play a guitar.

Such seems to be the case with a kid by the name of John Lennon. Or maybe not - he always liked music even before he discovered girls.
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Menlove Street, Liverpool.

John lived with his aunt (his mother's sister) and his uncle, but always was in contact with his mother. He never had much contact with his father Alf.

Julia Lennon taught her son how to play the banjo. Skiffle seeds were planted, one assumes. They both loved Elvis Presley. The first song he learned how to play was Fats Domino's "Ain't That a Shame."

School was Dovedale Primary (Infant) School. Up a few blocks, Dovedale intersects with Penny Lane. Nearby was the old sandstone quarry, subsequently a trash tip and industrial area. Upon passing his 11 Plus, John began attending nearby Quarry Bank Grammar School. Finished that in 1957.

Julia Lennon bought her son his first guitar in 1957. She warned him that he couldn't make a living with a guitar. Too late. School troublemaker John had already formed a band called ...erm... The Quarrymen.