Been there, done that...

A passionate ignorance.

Just in case you are not getting why the above picture of anti-China Olympics protesters is funny (or at least ironic)...
You should know that there WAS an Olympics held in Nazi Germany. You should also be made aware that, during those Olympics, Adolf Hitler's Master Race got it shoved up their asses by American Jessie Owens and others.

Lord Likely: Kidnap Victim?—Or Dashing Time-Traveler?

Lord Likely himself in modern times? Could it be?

Or is there some OTHER sinister plot afoot?

Queen Victoria Herself? HOW COULD HE!!

And the good-hearted, partially reformed lady of the evening, can she prevail over the wicked forces?

These answers and much MUCH more in mere days.

OH! The horrors--and ecstasies!--that await...

Astonishing, indeed!

Canadian Bacon—Fact or Fiction?

A Canucklehead recent post has got me thinking.

That in itself is a pretty dangerous concept, but, even worse, he has me thinking about food instead of hockey and/or beer. Which is all he usually talks about. Hate hockey. Used to love beer. Love other things now. Hockey and beer are pretty much what Canada seems to run on: hockey is the motivator, beer is the fuel.

But there is also a legend that they have a special secret kind of bacon.

I asked Canucklehead about this, but he won't answer. He just keeps babbling on about something he calls Greek Easter. So I thought I'd throw the question out to the all-knowing Brits. Unless Grumpus stumbles by and edifies me, which isn't likely. She knows everything. At least I'm pretty sure she does. Or maybe my favorite book lady. What's her name. The pretty one in Northern Ireland that claims she has mastered roundabouts. Not much chance of her showing up either, eh? (Yes, Catherine, I am aware that you can live in N. Ireland and still be a Brit. Don't throw the book at me.) A. would probably know. Or would lie to me authoritatively. Either way.

Claire wouldn't have a clue, but would be happy to talk about llamas or blow-up dolls. And I'd be happy to listen, too. You bet. Marmelade? She's either swearing at me right now because of my subject matter, or is simply screaming with her hands over her ears. Pork, you know. Sorry, my lovely orange one. You know I would never eat the stuff—I only want to know what it is. Ok? Marmelade?

Anyway. Every time I order breakfast in Canada, they bring me the same stuff as I get down here to the south. Same stuff exactly. When I ask them if it is really Canadian Bacon, they look at me like I'm stupid. "Sure it's Canadian Bacon, idiot. You're in Canada. Get it?" But I think they lie. (I don't actually eat it when they bring it, Marmelade. Nor the eggs. I only eat the grits and drink a little orange juice. I only order the bacon to see what it looks like. And the eggs just seem to come with it automatically. Go figure.)

So, is Canadian Bacon real? Or is it just a legend? Is it really just ham? Has anybody ever truly SEEN Canadian Bacon? If so, does it come in rashers or just plain American slices? Is this a real set of words I can add to my list? Or simply a myth? Is anybody listening to me?

Happily, I think M permits beer. At least I hope she does. Probably not hockey, though.

[Black bar over drunkard's eyes indicates this picture was

stolen from somebody else's blog, and identity of lush is being kept secret.]