Monday, March 17, 2008

Bugger This...Phase Two

We now have the web domain name and blog reserved for the book publicity when we need it.


  1. Aye Max! Count me in :) Would love and proud to be participated on your wonderful project.

  2. Hi Max,
    Wow. Can't wait to see what words you gals and guys are going to put up here. It's going to be fun. hehe....

  3. @Magpies zone

    That is fantastic, my new friend. I knew I could count on you! And you are right--it is going to be a lot of laughs to put together. Maybe we can make some beer money if nothing else!

    You are subscribing to my feed, right? But do come to the actual site today if you can and tell me what you think of my new header picture. Do you think it is too much for the ladies? It's the same picture I had on my entrecard widget to attract the boys'attention. Come look at it (in person instead of on your reader) and let me know what you think of it.


  4. @eastcoastlife--Wow! You came back! You flatter us with your presence! You've made me very happy!

    I have been by your blog a couple of times, but didn't leave a post. I will come back though.

    Thanks again for letting us hear from you again. I hope you become regular. Ahem...I mean "a" regular.

    Happy St. Patrick's day! I guess you know we have an Irishman running for president over here? (O'Bama)


  5. I'd be delighted to help if you are needing any, that is!

    My credentials are a British passport. Possibly that's all :)

  6. PS St Patrick is Irish not Britihs. I have Irish nationality too.... something of a bone of contention but one of my sons found it useful.

  7. I'm quite chuffed that you've added this humble Connecticut Colonial to your list. I'm sure it'll be far from bog standard - most definitely brilliant! - and I promise to give it some wellie.

    As for your blog header, though ... uhm ... I assume that small red triangle was Photoshopped in? Not that it's horribly evident that it was mind you (not!) but that's certainly not a proper pair of knickers she's got on there.

  8. Dear "A": (I'm afraid I am going to have to make up a proper name for you. This won't do...)

    Yes, I know St. Patrick was the patron saint of Ireland. What's your point? What am I missing? I am not Irish either, but of course I celebrate St. Patrick's Day. Is it not a holiday in Great Britain?

    I think I may have stumbled across another cultural difference here. Being American, I just assumed the whole world celebrated St. Patrick's day. Like one would wish a Jewish friend Merry Christmas. You really don't celebrate St. Patrick's Day over there? You don't really abuse each other's cultures and make crass jokes about your diverse backgrounds? Ouch! How oddly sad. I guess we Americans have been boiling in that melting pot so long we assume the entire world celebrates everybody else's cultural holidays. My bad. Sorry.

    St. Patrick's Day is celebrated here in the U.S. so--universally--, you took me quite by surprise with your comment. Here, even if you are Italian or German or Swedish, you still simply must wear some green and pinch pretty girls on the ____, and eat corn beef and cabbage, and have a parade. Oh "A"! You've made me quite sad. Say it ain't so! Ya mean that just because my ancestry is British, I'm not allowed to honor the wearing o' th' GREEN! Yikes! What a notion! I am honestly astounded! How can you be so....SEPARATE...over there? Truly? Well. To each his own. I didn't mean to put you off. It only seemed natural to wish you a happy St. Patricks day, as I would any other American. You've put me in culture shock. I think I may be writing the wrong book here.

    Whew! Let catch my breath! There. Ok. Now then. Would you REALLY consider helping me with this BritSpeak project from time to time? How absolutely SUPER that would be! You won't even need your British passport. Thank you. You'd better not be bluffing, because I will track you down! (You are wonderful. PLEASE don't let my enthusiasm scare you away like it has a couple of other frightened ladies who I thought were, well...tougher. I was more than they could take, I'm afraid. I'll bet you can see why right now.

    OK, then. I'm going to wander off now and try and walk if off. Thanks for allowing me to peak and level off again.

    I am going to put your name on my little help list. You'd better not be toying with me about helping me out here. When I come back, I will have thought up a proper name for you. It isn't that I can't spell "A", but....

  9. Dear Linda-Susie, how nice to hear from you. Even if I don't understand you hardly at all, it sounds so poetic. "Chuffed" sounds like it should mean "pissed." I hope you're not. Behind all that guff, does that mean you are really saying "yes?"

    As you instructed, I have taken a few moments to stare at that little red triangle. I had stolen this image from Google somewhere in my travels, and I hadn't really noticed until you just mentioned it. My intent was to get the likes of Lord Likely's attention in my entrecard travels. But I think you are right. It does not look quite natural, does it. Well, I'm pretty fair with PhotoShop myself, so the next time I have a few minutes, I'll go ahead and clone some pubic hair on that ugly red triangle. Give me a day or so. Thanks for calling it to my attention. But do you like her otherwise?

  10. Hello again Max -

    Were I of the male persuasion then I'm sure she'd be quite appealing. As women don't do it for me, she's a'ight, dawg.

    As for what I said above, "I'm quite chuffed that you've added this humble Connecticut Colonial to your list. I'm sure it'll be far from bog standard - most definitely brilliant! - and I promise to give it some wellie." - allow me to translate ... I'm quite pleased that you've added me to your list. I'm sure it will be far from boring - most definitely great! - and I promise to put some energy into it.

    There, does that sound more like "yes, I'd love to?"

  11. I just wanted to thank you for your loving commentary. It means so much to me. :)

  12. Dear Qelqoth:

    Thanks for stopping by. Go fuck yourself and take that vile blog of yours with you.

    Have a nice day.

  13. Linda:

    Please skip over that little bit there in the middle.

    I can't tell you how chuffed I am to hear your translation. Thanks a bunch. I'll be fun, I promise!

  14. Although I don't really know any BritSpeak, I might be able to toss in an Irish idiom here or there. I read entirely too many Andrew Greeley novels, so one or two such idioms may have stuck in my brain.

    As for your new banner... meh. A bit of a floozy, isn't she? The lass at the top of this post is much more attractive to my tired old eyes. But, as Linda pointed out, female eyes undoubtedly see things differently than male eyes.

  15. Well of course she looks like a floozy, Aerten. Isn't that the whole point? You see, I had thought, for some reason that I can't explain, that this new site would attract mostly men. Silly me. Hence the photo that I put on my entrecard widget--to draw men's eye to it in a crowd of widgets. Some people put rabbits and birthday cakes on their widget. I gravitated more toward nekkid wimmin.

    As it turned out, it was consistent dropping on blogs that I really liked that did the trick, not the widget. Go figure. Since I like history and books and sports and art and disrespectful women, well, here's how it turned out. I am glad I resisted the temptation to drop fast on all those real estate and Pinoy wedding sites. I only wish I could find a way to quit running off the ladies I am trying so hard to attract, with my big mouth and all. My humor is almost 100% sarcasm, and that sure doesn't come across well in writing. It is fine in person--some of my friends even think I am almost clever sometimes--but in a blog, not so much. I always forget to include those emoticons. Using too many seems phony to me. But better phony than lonely, I guess. I am so glad I still have you still passing through here. Surely you've noticed I have been trying extra hard to be nice to you and Linda, haven't you?

    Getting back to the subject of your comment, when I discovered the true makeup of my visitors, I considered using a picture of a hunk just to try and kiss up to the ladies. But two things stopped me: one, I would have to look at him everyday when I posted and I would not be willing to do that. Second, I am not about to have my wife walk by and see me in the act of scanning pictures of naked men. For now, you'll have to live with the floozy. Maybe if I put up a picture of a horse, Stine will come back. You never know. It would be worth a try. Rotating headers. Well, I'm off to eat some corned beef and cabbage. Ta.

  16. It's interesting to imagine your wife discovering you scanning pictures of naked men. Is like my sister, who would toss you out of the house (preferably nekkid) and immediately change all the locks and bars the doors and windows? Or is she more like me, who would laugh, shake her head and know without a doubt that you've gone completely dotty (perhaps secretly calling the family doctor for a check of the gray matter between the ears)?

    Regardless, you have an interesting marketing strategy, one that seems to work well enough to sell cars and beer and pretty much anything else. A rotating banner would be quite entertaining... not just rotating, but random. It would be a delightful game guessing whether I would see a floozy when visiting, or Sean Connery. You should have at least a dozen banners to increase one's anticipation of the event.

    Slainte Mhath!

  17. I'm just happy you used my favourite saying for this post :)

    St Patrick's day is celebrated here, but it is technically Irish...btw I think I preferred your header female when the image was smaller, bit too much on show there like Linda says :-0

    PS don't forget to talk about St. George's Day in April!

  18. I am in, if you add a hot male with UK undies on in your header :)

  19. Qelqoth:

    Well, I'm up and about now. How're things in sunshiney Southampton? Sorry it has taken me so long to respond but it was 1:25 am here when you commented and I was in bed belching up my Irish corned beef and cabbage. (We celebrated yesterday, so I wouldn't have to eat that shit on a workday.)

    Well, that's interesting that you

    Oh shit. Wrong post. Will meet you down at the football one. I was wondering what you were

  20. Wrong character, too. I'm really getting really shitzoid with these multiple personalities. I'm about ready to say, "Sod this for a game of soldiers" and just start using my real self and name and stop acting out variously. But that would entail baring my true self to you, and how embarrassing would THAT be?

    Hey! Let Yummy out! Shut up Yummy! Get back in there! Start over, Max. Ok.


    Good morning dear ones.

    @Aerten: What would MY wife do? She'd probably just check and see if I were having any reaction that might possibly be of some benefit to her and, if so, just drag me off to the bedroom. She's not that interested in HOW I get turned on any more--only if it results in something positive for her. I don't mind.


    Leave Max's floozy alone!

    Rotating banner? Random banner? Let this old salesman and ad man drop you a clue about the importance of "brand recognition." Never mind. I forgot. Your secret turn-on is to program some SQL. Just know this: LEAVE MY FLOOZY ALONE!

    And if I ever do put up a nekkid stud, it ain't gonna be that hairy Sean Connery. RIP Miss Moneypenny, by the way. God I use to have the hots for her the first time I saw Dr. No. You don't care? Then I'll just drop it. I was only trying to be interesting so some new people might visit this blog. Sort of try and make up for your boring stuff, Aerten. But I'll stop.

    Regrettably, you do have a point, however. I will find something suitable to temporarily replace my floozy with while she's in the shop (Photoshop) getting her despicable red triangle worked on.

  21. Dear Alison,

    How nice to have you visit again and give me another chance. I promise to be nice to you and Max will definitely watch his mouth and do nothing to offend you. After all, you are one of our favorite people. Favourite people. Favouuuuuurite people.

    Crap. She's probably gone again.

    St. George's Day? Ummmm, that one doesn't seem to be on my calendar. What the heck does St. George have to do with the Irish, anyway? (Just taunting you, Alison. Trying to lure another delightfully pithy comment from you. Forgive me for taunting your dear English self.) Ok! I get it! You work in a Castle. St. George. Dragons. Heck, as long as I don't have to slay any dragons, I'm game. How do we celebrate? Please don't tell me there's more corned beef and cabbage involved.

    [By the way, do you know what an Irish-American seven course meal consists of? A six-pack and a boiled potato. HarHarHar! (Get back in there Yummy. Down boy. Go find you a bitch while I finish talking to sweet Alison.)]

    Ok, Alsion. You win. The floozy and her wretched triangle is gone. History. Replaced by something the ladies will find more palatable. Sorry Eddy. We're outnumbered. I haven't read Claire's comment yet (I'm reading the comments by email right now) but I'm sure she won't care for her either. Goodbye floozy. (Not you, Alison.)

  22. Ok, I'm back. Had to go to the hospital.

    Everybody be sure and refresh your browser windows now. The floozy is gone. (Not Alison.)


    Hello Claire:

    What a pleasant surprise to see you back for more. Good to see you. And I mean that.

    Just to clarify my thinking--I have learned to be somewhat cautious with you--did you mean "I'm in" as in "Count me in with your little slang book project" or as in "I'll come back to your blog from time to time if you put up a picture of stud wearing British flag underwear?" God, I hope it's the former.

  23. Ok, I'm back. Had to go to the hospital.

    Everybody be sure and refresh your browser windows now. The floozy is gone. (Not Alison.)


    Hello Claire:

    What a pleasant surprise to see you back for more. Good to see you. And I mean that.

    Just to clarify my thinking--I have learned to be somewhat cautious with you--did you mean "I'm in" as in "Count me in with your little slang book project" or as in "I'll come back to your blog from time to time if you put up a picture of stud wearing British flag underwear?" God, I hope it's the former.

  24. Sorry about the duplicate comment. I must have clicked twice.

    My fingers always tremble whenever the required action has something to do with Claire.

  25. Dear Aerten: Slainte Mhath right back at you. That better had not be dirty, girl.

    I wish Catherine hadn't left us. She could probably tell me what that Irishspeak means.

    But, bet you will. You better.

  26. Sláinte mhath! Good health! I can do Irish. ;)
    Quite glad to see the floozy gone, but Maggie!?? Eeee, hecky thump!
    And don't forget St Andrew's Day (November)
    Thanks for commenting on my blog - not compulsory at all, but I'm so glad to hear you're a cat lover.
    You're welcome to call me anything you like, as long as it begins with A. :)

  27. Dear a.: Here is today's tirade/lecture.

    #1: I'm impressed! So those were good words after all. I am even more impressed that you were tough enough to come back to my little private hell here. My admiration for you has gone up several notches. (And that's saying something considering how much I thought of you after visiting your blog. : )

    Anyway, I will surely put you on my list. Thank you! I am beginning to take heart again. Before today, all I had were two, maybe three, American ladies on my team, and they're not too much help in translating from the original British and Australian. (Although that Linda lady fancies she's pretty hot stuff. Come to think of it, she is!)

    #2: I did expect you to guess Lady Thatcher. Thank you for not letting me down. But how about the OTHER lady? Hint: it's Dutch, not Irish. (No Americans are allowed to respond to this part of the post, by the way, until a. has had a chance to respond. Since I am trying to learn a little bit about the Brits and Aussies (and now Singaporean, Norwegian, and South African ladies as well) it is only fair that I see what, if anything, you high-class ladies know about my own humble place of birth.

    #3: Eeee, hecky thump! ???? I will just let that one pass now. It's been a long day.

    #4: I didn't say I LIKE cats. I said I OWNED a lot of cats. I send them out on the streets to work everyday and bring me money. Just kidding, of course. I love cats. (And me 'an Yummy are DOGS!)

    #5 (Boy you sure know how to make your comments pithy, don't you? A lot of stuff packed in that little innocent comment today.) St. Andrew's Day. November. Now you've got me. Something to do with Scotland. Something to do with your flag. You have driven me off to Wikipedia. Ahl be bach. (That's ArnoSpeak. Can you translate that as well?) At least I have until November on that one.

    #6 Did you ever see that dumb-but-funny movie "Animal House"? (By the way, I am beginning to absolutely LOVE putting my punctuation OUTSIDE the quotation marks. It makes SO much more sense than the American Rules that were beaten into my head by sadistic teachers as an innocent Yank-Child so long ago.) If you did, you will probably remember the scene where Belushi/Blutto is handing out pins to the new pledges to the fraternity. Especially Pinto and Flounder. If you didn't, that's ok, too. From now on, your BritSpeak and Yummy name is...Achelois.

    Because you truly are, that's why. God bless you, lady.

  28. Yes, indeed. The floozy has left the building. A slight improvement, but as a.A.a said, eeee, hecky thump! (And I don't even know what I just said, but it certainly sounds good.)

    Oh, and a.A.a is absolutely correct about Slainte mhath. Good health!

    (Now I think a.A.a and I will have to go off to a corner by ourselves and speak Irish together. I do so need to practice.)

    (Oh, and a... I hope you don't mind the a.A.a thing. It's artistic, you see, and Mad Max here seems to be a bad influence.)

  29. Aerten. Do you really speak the Irish? Gaelic, but we call it "The Irish." Or quite a bit of it? How cool! Sadly, that's another book, though, huh? I mean, it isn't just goofy English, it's a whole 'nother language.

    OkOkOkOk--it's NOT goofy. It's "picturesque". I love it! That's why I'm here! Put those pitchforks down!

  30. I'm back!
    Eleanor Roosevelt is the other person on your header. Do I get extra points?
    I threw in St Andrew's Day mainly because it intrigues me that St Patrick's Day seems to be spreading and growing in an almost Disneyfied way, like Halloween, whereas St Andrew's Day isn't at all, and yet there must as many Scots the world over as Irish. Ditto for St George and St David.
    I learnt Irish many, many years ago at school - my first non-native language. It was a nightmare for me - all fada and bouilte - though my cousins all spoke it fluently at home. Perhaps they still do. I never go to Ireland for fear of having to visit them all....
    a.A.a. - I rather like that, and I don't have to remember the spelling :)

  31. @Max... Is ea. Níl agam ach beagáinín Gaeilge. That is, yes. I only speak a little Irish. I've been trying to learn from books and tapes for the past 8 or 9 years, but with no one to practice with, I forget a lot. I speak it more often than write it (still not all that much) because the spellings (as a.A.a alluded to) are crazy-making.

    a.A.a... Ah, if only I had the chance to go to Ireland! (Ok, I DO have the chance... a small one... this year. Perhaps my brother and his wife will decide a cruise is not for them, and Mr. Aerten and I will go to Ireland instead.) I have distant cousins over there, none of whom I've met and I'm fairly certain none of them are in the Gaeltacht. It's a fascinating language, despite the fact that the spellings are brutal.

  32. So, we have to post any Brit Speak idioms in here so we can discuss it or you will create any page/forum for this project? Sorry to ask this silly question, I'm a TWOCKER :)

  33. @magpies zone

    I think I am trying to make this too hard and blah. What do you say we just continue to let it develop naturally on its own for a bit more, until we have enough material to edit into an interesting book? (And enjoy each other's company some more while we wait for the book to write itself.) I think I was wrong when I said we needed to hurry up and finish this thing. If we force it, all we will end with is another generic list. We can do better than that. We as a group are much more interesting than a simple Wikepedia article. Let's keep going just as we are for a while longer and let the new words take care of themselves as they pop into your creative and funny heads, and let them be automatically recorded in the blog. I will wait for input from the others, but something tells me this thing shouldn't be simply forced into a list. What we really have here is a living journal, isn't it? That is where the real book is hidden, I now think. Your thoughts and the thoughts of the others are appreciated. For my part, I am just going to lighten up a little bit and go back to having some fun. For a while longer, at least. What is the time difference between you and me, by the way? It is 9:12 am here as I write this.

    "Twonker"--thank you for the great new word! If we do end up with a list of special words on the back page of our book, that one is for sure going to be on that list!

    Please print out a copy of that long post, and then carefully tear it up and throw it away. Let's just keep having fun for a while. Perhaps you may agree with my "lightbulb" post I just made.

  34. Eleanor Roosevelt is indeed correct. Ding! Thank you for playing! I will take your word that you didn't cheat and do research behind my back. I am more then impressed. I'm agog.

    (I wasn't trying to make fun of either Eleanor or Lady Thatcher. I was simply trying to come up with Floozy opposites, and they seemed to just appear out of the tangled forest that is my disjointed mind.)

  35. 'In' as in I am happy to contribute in my own special way :)

    I could be your expert from the North West of England :)

  36. Thank you Claire. I am now totally clear. And happy.

    Please try and read the current post when you get a chance. The one with the lightbulb on it. Turns out I got even more stupid than usual and posted a pack of lies. Didn't think they were lies at the time, but that post was wrong, I think. My apologies. Thanks again for your support. (That was a serious thank you and not a sarcastic thank you. You have been fantastic. And patient.)

  37. magpies zone: I sent you that invite thing to your gmail address if you want to check that email and respond. Thanks.



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